“So Larry we’re cool right? I mean all that stuff is in the past”

“Haha sure.”

“Ryan will you be good to go in tomorrow’s game”

“That depends what Danny wants, see we’re tank—”

“Did you say tanking?”

“No no of course not, I said tanning! Tanning, me and Danny are going out tanning”

“5th Pick”

“Like omg, are you Will Smith?”

“Why yes I am ladies…”
“Clutch”

The NBA ON ABC:

“Stephen Harrington picks up his 5th foul!”

*4 minutes later*

“I’m sorry that was actually Jason Terry with his 1st”

“Bang!”

*6 minutes later*

“Al Davis picks up his 3rd!”

“Better Basketball with Steve Nash”

“Quality Guaranteed Or Your Money Back!”

Spurs/Nuggets Series 2007:

“Jr get in there we need a 3, I want you to shoot it”

*Clang*

“Don’t even look at me, just go back to the bench”

*After Game*

“I don’t know what the hell he was thinking. I told him if you’re in the game don’t shoot a 3, but I guarantee it won’t happen again on my watch. He certainly didn’t get the idea from me.”

“Getting drafted by the team you didn’t want: 5 million dollars”

“Threatening to sit out the year rather than playing in freakin’ Milwaukee: Free publicity”

“Being guaranteed 25 minutes a game and showing up whenever you feel like it…. Priceless”

The keys to rebuilding a team are simple.

Step 1-Trade Star player, get 12th pick in the draft.
Step 2-??????
Step 3-Profit

“But Mr. King, what’s step 2?”

“This conference is over sir. Good day”

“Devin! Devin! Is it true Mark is going a different direction this summer! Is it a trade, workout regimen! Please give us the scoop!”

“Well I don’t know about Dirk, but Mark was pretty clear on what I’d be doing”