Breaking News: Lebron James Wants Dwyane Wade Traded For Chris Paul

Trouble is reportedly brewing in Miami as new superstar Lebron James has privately requested that fellow teammate Dwyane Wade be traded for Hornets star, Chris Paul.

Lebron’s friend and agent, Maverick Carter, is already rumored to be selling another one hour special to ESPN entitled, The Decision: Part II.

The self proclaimed ‘King’ James will put Wade on the hotseat, and decide if he truly wants him on the team or wish him best on his future endeavors in New Orleans.

Gilbert Arenas Blames Halo

Gilbert Arenas has given a statement to the media today stating it’s not his fault.

Gil says he was emotionally invested by the videogame known as ‘Halo’ and was caught up in a world not his own.

“I didn’t know what I was doing. I wasn’t in control. I thought I was Master Chief but probably I was just an idiot.”

Gilbert is believed to be one of 14 players who still refuse to disconnect from Halo 2′s online service going by the handle ‘xxGILBOWIZJAILxx’

The Answer by Nir Regev

The Answer
by Nir Regev

Today I watched my childhood hero reduced to a normal person
Fourteen years ago I came across an individual different than the rest
A small basketball player, tiny in his world, who overcame in a land of giants
He was confident, he had heart, but most importantly he was fast
Lightening speed to be exact, you could never catch him
The only way to stop him was to hurt him

I watched the inevitable occur tonight and even though I knew the day would come
I didn’t want to believe it
You see I’ve always believed in speed
Everything must be fast, everything must be instant
Everything must happen, or everything never will

In my youth I took pride in running against people
It was not enough to win, I wanted a gap forever stitched in their mind that they could never beat me in a race
Here was this rookie barely any taller than me running circles around the competition
He couldn’t be stopped unless quite literally slammed to the ground by multiple people
He kept getting up over and over again, he was my role model, I looked up and I believed in the message, I believed in the Answer

The time came in the year 2001,that ‘The Answer’ made a dream run and prove what I believed to be true, that speed reigns over everything, and you can do anything without anyone’s help
And it was so very, very close to being realized
Then a mere inch from the finish line something happened
He came in second
And It was never that close again

Every year after I watched, I cheered, I supported
I caught every game, every piece of news, every interview, every practice
But it never happened
In fact the more I wanted it to happen, the worst it got
That run was over nine years ago

As I watched my role model now officially cut from where he started it all, it’s hard to watch
It’s sad to watch
But the most difficult part through all this
Is the lesson that nothing is forever, that there’s no going back to a certain time
Speed is a product of youth, speed burns out
It’s temporary
You only get one chance with it
In the end it wasn’t getting hurt that was Iverson’s greatest enemy
It was getting older

Ed Stefanski Knows What Rhymes With Win… And It’s Not The Sixers

Ed Stefanski is reportedly unhappy with how the Sixers are playing. “The coaching staff, the players, we’re all not happy, I’ve got to do my job!”

Eddie Jordan however, is happy with the teams 10-23 record, claiming marked improvement over what he originally expected. “When they let go of Andre, I thought oh man, I’m gonna get fired, but here I am!”

Nevertheless, the Sixers have big things to look forward to after such victories over the league best Nets and a Nuggets team missing half their starting lineup. Most likely the lottery.

Philadelphia 76ers 2009!!

“Congratulations guys! That makes two wins in a row tonight! Things are going good……. ”

“…………..”

“Maybe too good!! We need to change things up! Elton you’re gonna come off the bench for Lou and Lou you’re replacing Sammy in the starting lineup!”

BSPN Returns With All New Headlines on January 1st 2010!!

BSPN comes back with all new stories daily this January!!! Get Ready!!!

NBA Captions: Rasheed and Pierce

“Then Doc was like why u gotta shoot so many threes son, and told me to go to the post. So I shot 19 threes in a row”

“Damn n*gga you cold as ice, like my knees”

Dantoni and Nate Robinson

“Come on coach, let me in!!”

“Robinson if we weren’t on live television right now, I’d drop your ass”

“Coachhhh, I be better than Duhon come on now”

“The only thing you’re better at is not meeting the 5 foot barrier, now sit down”

“Crap, Duhon just sprained his ankle. Alright fine here’s your chance, don’t mess up”

“I promise coach!!!”

*2 seconds later*

“Nate what the hell are you doing that’s the wrong basket”

“So?”

NBA Captions: Rondo Reads

“Hey, you tryin to upstage me?! Only reason you read faster is cause u always holdin the motherf*ckin’ book. Now stop crying before Rondo comes over there and slaps the taste out of your punkass mouth”

NBA Captions: Knicks Conference

“Look it’s not about the playoffs or wins! Or even draft picks! We’re trying to build something special here. When I saw Nate shooting at our basket, I thought, wow what an innovater, how come Steve never thought about doing that? Is Donnie still here? Oh I see he is. I love Nate Robinson”